


Last Young Renegade

by A_Little_Bit_of_Everything



Series: Album Fics [2]
Category: IT (Movies - Muschietti)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Porn, Asexual Ben, Ben and Bev are In Love, Beverly Marsh Deserves Nice Things, Bill is Just Trying His Best, Boys In Love, Disabled Character, Eddie And Bev Love Each Other, Eddie has a lot of feelings, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Even If They Worry A Lot, Fluff, Implied Polyamorous Losers Club (IT), Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Moving Away, Multi, Nightmares, Past Child Abuse, Polyamory, Pregnancy, Richie Tozier Loves Eddie Kaspbrak, Richie is Gay and Dumb, Service Dogs, Smut, Soft Eddie Kaspbrak, Soft Richie Tozier, Stan and Richie Are Gonna Be Good Dads, Teen Romance, Teenagers, stan is jealous, that's about it
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-11
Updated: 2021-02-14
Packaged: 2021-03-02 16:54:31
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 4,609
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24120163
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/A_Little_Bit_of_Everything/pseuds/A_Little_Bit_of_Everything
Summary: A series of disconnected drabbles based on the songs from All Time Low's album Last Young Renegade.Any trigger warnings will be put at the beginning of each chapter.
Relationships: Ben Hanscom/Beverly Marsh, Beverly Marsh/Richie Tozier/Stanley Uris, Bill Denbrough/Eddie Kaspbrak, Bill Denbrough/Mike Hanlon/Ben Hanscom/Eddie Kaspbrak/Beverly Marsh/Richie Tozier/Stanley Uris, Eddie Kaspbrak/Beverly Marsh, Eddie Kaspbrak/Richie Tozier, Mike Hanlon/Richie Tozier, Richie Tozier/Stanley Uris
Series: Album Fics [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1339507
Comments: 1
Kudos: 24





	1. Last Young Renegade

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You were the best thing that ever happened to me  
> And I'll keep on fighting just to make you believe  
> You were my last young renegade heartache

Richie pulls himself through the open window of the Uris’ house, falling rather ungracefully onto the floor. His entrance is met with a barrage of curses and a flashlight being shined directly in his face. 

“Geez louise, dim the lights officer, I’m unarmed.” Richie says in a poor attempt at a fifties schoolboy voice and uses a hand to shield his eyes from the blinding light.    
  
“What the fuck Richie? Are you trying to give me a heart attack? Why the fuck are you climbing through my window in the middle of the night?” Stan asks, sleep thick in his voice, but he lowers the flashlight so it isn’t blinding Richie.

“I missed you Stan my man, you haven’t been at the clubhouse in a couple days.” 

It wasn’t a lie, Richie had missed Stan the last couple days. He didn’t know why Stan had suddenly disappeared, but he wanted to make sure he was okay. 

Stan doesn’t look at Richie when he responds. “Missed me? I figured you’d be too busy hanging out with Eddie to notice.” 

Richie feels like he’s been punched in the stomach when Stan says that, “W-what do you mean?”

“Oh don’t act like you don’t know, you clearly have a thing for Eddie, I was just staying out of your way.”

Now Stan had run through several possibilities of how Richie would react when this eventually happened, Richie crying was not one of those possibilities. Yet here Richie was, sat on Stan’s floor, tears slowly streaming down his face. 

“Is that really what you think? That’s why you’re avoiding me?” Richie asks around the lump in his throat. 

Stan feels guilt start to slowly gnaw at him as Richie sits and cries. “I...I just thought...I thought I was getting in your way.”    
  
Richie sniffles and looks up at Stan, and it absolutely breaks Stan’s heart. “Eddie is my friend, just my friend, he’s not-he’s not the one I have feelings for.”

“Oh? But there is someone? That you have feelings for I mean?” Stan says and moves to sit next to Richie.

“Yeah, don’t think he likes me very much though.”   
  


“What makes you say that?”

“He’s been avoiding me for the last week because he thought I was puttin’ the moves on our friend.” Richie says and looks over at Stan, he’s still crying and he looks so earnest that Stan knows this isn’t a joke. 

It’s a little unnerving to see Richie like this, Richie is rarely so sincere, he always managed to turn things into a joke,  _ especially  _ if it involved his feelings at all. “Richie...do you mean that?” 

Richie nods slowly, “It’s not a big deal I know you don’t feel the sa-” 

Stan cuts him off rather abruptly by kissing him. It’s sloppy and the angle is weird but none of that matters to Richie because  _ holy fuck Stan is kissing him _ . When they pull apart Stan smiles and cradles Richie’s face. “You were saying?” 

Richie doesn’t know what to say, so instead of saying anything he kisses Stan again.


	2. Drugs and Candy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You get me out of my head  
> I fill the space in your bed  
> High on the beat of a breakdown

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warning for canon character death, explicit sexual content, and emotional breakdowns kinda? Richie is really sad so he like feels bad so I think that's the best way to word it.

The struggle didn’t end when they left Derry, Richie was beginning to worry that it never would end. He woke up every night in a cold sweat about to call out for someone who wasn’t there.

Except for these nights. The nights he spends in someone else’s bed. More specifically in Mike’s bed. Mike was good to Richie in almost every way. He was a good friend, a good lover, and understood when Richie randomly broke down.

“Fuck Mike, please I need you.” Richie gasps as he’s abruptly dropped onto the hotel mattress. 

“Yeah? You want me to take care of you princess?” Mike says lowly and moves so he’s hovering over Richie.    
  
Richie whines and closes his eyes. “Please Mike…”

Mike undresses Richie roughly and starts sucking marks into every available inch of skin. “You’re so easy Rich, I barely have to do anything and you’re begging.”    
  
“ _ Mike _ .” Richie cries out. It’s true, Richie has always been a bit of an easy fuck. He’s always been desperate for attention and more importantly praise his whole life, it’s only natural it would extend to sex.    
  
Mike finally relents and flips Richie over onto his stomach. He takes a moment to slide a pillow under Richie’s hips, because Mike Hanlon is the world’s nicest man no matter how rough he was in the moment. Richie is almost surprised that Mike doesn’t thank him for spreading his legs when they finish, Mike is just too polite for his own good in Richie’s opinion. “You’re so cute baby.” Mike says and presses a kiss to the small his. He slowly presses one of his fingers into Richie and Richie apparently spaced out since he didn’t even notice Mike slicking up his fingers.    
  
“Fuck, Mike, god that’s so good, fuck your fingers are so thick, like thick with eight C’s thick.”    
  
Mike laughs, which is kind of amazing, no one but Richie has ever been able to make him laugh during sex. Not that Mike exactly had a large amount of sexual encounters. Hunting a demon clown from outer space didn’t exactly get him in the mood. 

“You’re ridiculous baby, even when I’m fucking you you can’t shut up.”    
  


That makes something inside Richie crack a bit, the vague sound of a voice yelling at him to shut up while laughing in a too small hammock. But he pushes that down, forcing himself to focus on the feels of Mike’s fingers fucking into him fast and hard.    
  
Mike doesn’t drag out fingering Richie for very long. He’s always secretly just as desperate as Richie during these encounters, he only ever wanted to give Richie what he wanted. He slides in with a low moan, his quiet string of curses drown out by Richie moaning like it’s being dragged out of his throat.    
  


This was exactly what Richie needed, what he wanted. Mike knew exactly how to get him out of his head, he wouldn’t trust anyone else to do this. He had tried a couple times, bringing someone random home. But when one dude calls you a pussy for crying when he gets on top of you, let’s just say it’s better to stick with someone who gets it.    
  
Mike gets it. He lets Richie stay on bottom, doesn’t mind that Richie cries most of the time, he doesn’t even mind that Richie makes him stop halfway through because everything is just too much.    
  


It isn’t what Richie really wants. What he wants he can’t have. He wants Eddie to be alive. He wants Eddie to love him. But that isn’t possible so this is good too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So shout out to finally finishing this after a month and a cross country move.


	3. Dirty Laundry

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Filled up with all the skeletons she's kept  
> Nobody's perfect I confess  
> But she's perfect enough without ever dressing up

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So somewhere along the way of writing this Ben became asexual so I'm rolled with it. We stan an ace king.

Ben knew the first time he saw Beverly he would always be in love with her. And he was. Even when he couldn’t remember her he still loved her. He loved every version of Bev. He loved her when they were kids and her short hair gleamed like a halo in the summer sun, he loved her when she was just a name on a page and a vague feeling of something being missing, and he loved her now with her soft features and lines just starting to show her age. And in a strange turn of events Bev loved him too. 

There were parts of them that had changed in the twenty-seven years they were apart. Little cracks other relationships left. It was worse for Bev, the amount of abuse she had gone through made Ben’s stomach turn any time he thought about it. But Ben hadn’t come out great either, though he’d never admit it. He had tried dating different girls over the years. But there was just something keeping him from connecting with people. He thought maybe something was wrong with him, like he was incapable of loving anyone. It had frustrated his small handful of girlfriends, one in particular said kissing him was like trying to kiss a wood board. So he had given up on ever finding a partner, it left him with this deep pit of loneliness but it was better than constantly disappointing people. 

  
But then he found Bev again. And he remembered being so in love with her that it took his breath away. But that didn’t change the fact that there was still something different about Ben. Because no matter how much he loved her, and he did love her, he just didn’t enjoy physical intimacy that went farther than kissing or cuddling. He had been scared to bring it up with Bev at first. He’d only talked about it with anyone he dated once, she had gotten angry and accused him of not being attracted to her, so he wasn’t exactly thrilled at the thought of repeating that conversation. Ben did it though, because Bev deserved to be told the truth. She knew that something was wrong before Ben even started talking.    
  
Bev listened to him talk about everything, of course she did, Bev wasn’t like anyone else Ben had been with before. She loved him just as much as he loved her, Ben just had trouble remembering that sometimes. After he finished Bev pulled him into a hug and assured him that everything was okay, that  _ he _ was okay. There wasn’t anything wrong with him, she still loved him.    
  
He and Bev weren’t perfect, but they loved each other and that was all they really needed. They had missed out on so much in their time apart. There were enough skeletons in their closets to fill an entire graveyard. But they had each other. So really what more did they need.


	4. Good Times

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I’ll take you at your word and carry on  
> I’ll hate the goodbye  
> But I won’t forget the good times

Eddie sat on the floor of the clubhouse sulkily. He knew the others were probably looking for him. He was supposed to meet them at the quarry to go swimming, it was their last chance to do it together before Bill moved away. But Eddie couldn’t do it. He couldn’t sit there and pretend everything was okay when Bill was _leaving_. He was leaving, and they wouldn’t be able to see him until next summer. What were they supposed to do for a whole year without a leader? What was Eddie supposed to do without his best friend?

He hears the hatch open but doesn’t look up, he knows who it is already. 

“H-Hey Eds, you didn’t come to the q-quarry, I was worried.” Bill says softly and walks over to Eddie.   
  
Eddie keeps his gaze firmly on the ground. He isn’t going to look at Bill, if he does that he’ll break. And that’s not what he wants Bill to see. He doesn’t want Bill’s last memory of him to be crying on the floor of the clubhouse. He didn’t want Bill to remember him and think that everyone was right about Eddie, that he was just a crybaby and a real loser.   
  
“Eddie...please tah-talk to me, you’re my b-b-best friend. I can’t leave without saying goodbye.”   
  


“What if that’s what _I_ wanted? What if I wanted you to leave and not say goodbye?” Eddie says, his voice is thick with tears he was trying not to let fall. 

Bill sits down next to Eddie, leaning against him slightly. “You don’t mean that, I’d n-never leave without saying g-g-goodbye.” There’s a pause and then Bill says the thing that is the final blow to Eddie’s heart, “You’re my best friend Eds… I couldn’t leave you like that.”

A little sob bubbles out of Eddie’s chest, his sadness suddenly too big for his chest. It felt like it was ripping out of him. No one was ever supposed to feel that heartbroken. But Eddie was feeling it regardless. It filled him up until he was drowning in it. 

“I don’t want you to go. You’re gonna leave and forget about all of us...about _me_.” Eddie’s voice broke around the words. There was more he wanted to say, so much more meaning behind those few words. 

Bill knew he had to say something, he knew the meaning behind what Eddie was saying. He stuttered out the start of several sentences, but his words were scattered around his head like marbles he couldn’t quite gather up into something meaningful. 

Bill’s voice has betrayed a lot in life, but it had never given out at a more important moment than this. He moves to pull Eddie into his arms. He pours all his heart into holding Eddie together, like if he lets go Eddie will crumble to pieces if he let go. “I-I won’t f-for-forget you Eds.” 

It isn’t enough. It doesn’t stop the chasm that’s opening inside Eddie. But the cold comfort is still comfort, he clings to that and Bill. 

“I w-won’t forget you, I promise.” Bill says firmly, he could never forget Eddie. He’d remember him forever, no matter what.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last post of the year baby. Hope 2021 is a good one.


	5. Nice2KnoU

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> One last call at the corner store  
> Nights on ice if we don’t score  
> One more time for second chances

Richie leans out the door to the corner store to call out behind him. “Come on Eddie Spaghetti, I’m not gettin’ any younger here!” 

“Shut the fuck up asshole.” Eddie huffed as he caught up with Richie. “We’ve got all night you don’t have to rush.”

“Well I was hoping to stop by and get some alone time with your mother before we head out.” Richie says with a wide grin. 

If looks could kill Eddie would have been charged with a felony. But it doesn’t last, melting into a smile he tries to hide. Because Eddie would rather die than admit to finding any of Richie’s jokes about his mother amusing. “Beep beep Richie.” 

Richie’s grin only grows wider at that, but he doesn’t make any comment for the first time in his life. 

“How exactly are you paying for all this anyway?” Eddie asked as Richie grabbed miscellaneous snacks and drinks off the store shelves. 

“I spent the last two months’ saving up, the neighbors probably think I’m planning a break in with the amount of chores I offered to do.” 

Eddie looked up at Richie as he continues looking for anything else they’d need for the night. “Is that why you haven’t been around as much? You were working these last couple months?” It made his chest feel warm inside, Richie had gone through all that effort just to make tonight the best it could be. 

“Yeah,” Richie’s face heats up under Eddie’s gaze, “Come on, that should be everything we need.” 

The two boys left with bags full of junk food and started the walk back to Richie’s truck. Eddie slid into the passenger seat when they got there. He winced when Richie turned the key and the engine sputtered, refusing to start. 

“Fuck, the duct tape must have come loose.” Richie muttered and popped the hood before getting out. 

Eddie leans out the passenger’s side window to watch Richie apply more tape to the engine. “I hope you know the things that you do to this poor truck hurt me physically  _ and _ emotionally.”

“Yeah, yeah, I’m the bane of your existence, you’ll stab me in my sleep if I don’t let you change the oil, I’ve heard it all before Eds.” 

“I’m gonna fucking follow you to college like a stalker girlfriend just to take care of your car.”

“Oooo is this like a kinky sex thing?  _ Oh no! I’m stranded on the side of the road won’t you help me sir _ ?” Richie swoons in a high-pitched voice. 

Eddie scoffs and rolls his eyes. “Shut the fuck up asshole, it isn’t a sex thing.” 

Richie laughs, slamming the hood closed, “Sure it isn’t Spaghetti.” 

They end up driving out to an empty field outside of town. Richie layers the bed of the truck with blankets to make it at least slightly more comfortable. 

“So I got some extra stuff before I picked you up.” Richie said, revealing a bottle of vodka that he had stashed under the front seat. 

Eddie raises an eyebrow and tries to suppress a smile. “Are you trying to ply me with drinks to get laid? Do you think I’m that easy?”

“You’ve never been easy Eds, especially when I’m involved.” Richie shoots back with a grin. 

Eddie’s smile falters, that unspoken  _ thing _ between him and Richie starting to bubble up again. “What can I say? You make it easy to argue, I like fighting with you. I mean, fuck, that sounds super fucked up doesn’t it?” 

Richie shakes his head and pushes himself into the bed of the truck to sit next to Eddie. “Nah, my parents like fighting too, and they’re fine, because it’s never a real fight. It’s like, I don’t know, they just fucking love to talk to each other. And fighting is just another excuse to talk.” Richie bumps their shoulders together softly. “That’s why we work so well together.” 

Eddie takes the vodka from Richie and takes a swig from the bottle. His nose crinkles up at the flavor. “Do you think we’ll still work? During college I mean, I know we’ve never talked about this...whatever we are. We kinda have. But not really.” Eddie stops himself from rambling further by taking another long drink of vodka.

“Yeah, I think we will. Fuck we’ll probably be better, because we won’t have to hide it from anyone.” Richie says and accepts the vodka bottle when Eddie offers it to him. “We could actually go on dates, if you wanted.” Richie mumbles the last bit into the mouth of the bottle. 

“Is that something  _ you _ would want?” Eddie asks.

“Yeah, maybe.” Richie says, taking a long gulp of vodka to steel his nerves for whatever is next. “What about you?”

Eddie smiles a little and catches Richie’s hand in his. He looks up at the stars, letting out a breath that it feels like he’s been holding since he was thirteen. “Yeah, maybe.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one really got away from me. It's absolutely the longest one in this series.


	6. Life of The Party

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I keep thinking about you  
> How you level me out sometimes  
> When I’m out of my head

Beverly Marsh was a godsend. Everyone around her knew that, it was just a Bev thing. She knew just how to pull people down to earth and get them out of their heads. 

No one knew this better than Richie Tozier and Stanley Uris. 

The trio had started dating in college. And it had been far from perfect, but it was meant to be them. It was always meant to be Richie, Bev, and Stan smashed into a queen size bed and tripping over each other to get ready for classes in the morning. And it was meant to be them now, sitting in a house with no furniture and a very pregnant Beverly sitting on the floor. 

Stan sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose as he hangs up his phone. “The movers got stuck almost seven hours away, they won’t be here until tomorrow.” 

“What are we gonna do then? Rent a hotel for the night?” Richie asks.

Beverly groans softly, “Not another hotel, I’m about ready to never see a hotel room again as long as I live.” 

“Well you can’t exactly sleep on the floor Red,” Richie points out. He begins pacing back and forth, running a hand through his messy curls. “Should we just go buy a new bed? Is that an option? I’ll go buy a new bed right now if you want.” 

“I don’t think that’s a good idea,” Stan says, he also begins pacing. He flaps his hands as he walks the length of the living room. “This wasn’t supposed to happen, we were supposed to have our furniture here and set up this morning.” 

Bev can see both the boys starting to spiral, if she doesn’t intervene then Stan might actually agree to buying another mattress with Richie. “Alright, help me up boys, I’m starving and saw a diner on the way in to the neighborhood.” 

Stan and Richie jump into action, carefully pulling Bev to her feet. “Are you alright, babylove? Do you need anything before we go?” Stan asked as she gains her balance. 

“Nope, I’m good to go get some pancakes if you guys are.” 

So they pile back into the car that they spent the last two days in. 

The diner is nice, it’s the kind of little place they would have hung out in when they were kids. Stan pulls out Beverly’s chair for her before sitting down himself. 

“Aw,  _ Stan, _ ” Richie whines dramatically as he sits down, “Why do you never pull my chair out?”

Stan rolls his eyes fondly and shakes his head, “When you’re pregnant then I’ll pull your chair out for you.” 

Beverly laughs and picks up a menu to see what she wants. 

They end up getting a hotel room for the night after they leave the diner. It’s not ideal, and Beverly would rather die than sleep in another set of stiff hotel sheets. But she also knows that sleeping in anything but a bed wouldn’t end well. 

She sits on the bed and brushes her hair while Stan and Richie shower. It’s comforting that even in hotels Richie still practices his voices in the shower. He cheers in triumph when one of the impressions makes Stan laugh. “Okay so that one is staying in my set.” 

Richie comes out of the bathroom first, a towel hanging loosely around his waist and another being used to dry his hair. “Is that my shirt?” He asks as he looks Bev over. 

It is, Bev had raided the boys' luggage for something to sleep in and had come out with one of Richie’s faded band shirts and Stan’s sweat pants. “Yeah, I didn’t have any clean clothes. Plus I like this shirt.” 

“It looks good on you, better than it ever did on me.” 

Bev shakes her head with a smile, “Well  _ I _ think it looks great on you, everything does,” She waves him over to sit on the bed with her, “Come here, let me brush out your hair.”

Richie doesn’t put up a fight, he’d do anything Beverly told him to. And how was he supposed to resist his beautiful wife playing with his hair? He climbs onto the bed, pressing a kiss to Bev’s stomach before turning so he's sitting with his back to her. 

“Your hair is getting so long baby, we’ll have to get it trimmed soon.” Beverly comments as she carefully runs the brush through his hair. 

“Maybe I’ll just shave my head, go full Britney with it.” Richie laughs softly, practically melting into Beverly’s touch. 

“You’d look like an egg with a shaved head.” Stan deadpans as he walks into the room.

“I prefer to think I’d look like a young Professor X.”

The two continue to bicker, much to Bev’s amusement as they get ready for bed. She loves them so much. Even if things don’t always go as planned. 


	7. Nightmares

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They still haunt me  
> I think about it every now and again  
> Now there’s a ghost in the back of this room

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warning for talks of past abuse and some brief descriptions of violence. 
> 
> Em this is for you bb

Eddie wakes up with a start, which isn’t out of the ordinary after leaving Derry for the second time, this time with his memories intact. Bill is snoring softly where he continues sleeping soundly beside him. Eddie runs a hand through sweat damp hair and takes a deep breath. 

_ It wasn’t real. You’re alive still. It’s all okay. _

A soft whine sounds from the side of the bed. Eddie looks over, only to be met with a set of concerned eyes peering up at him. Lottie lays her large head on the bed and nudges against Eddie’s leg. He gently scratches between her ears. Eddie hadn’t been sure about getting a service dog when it was first brought up. He was worried that the dog wouldn’t like him, or would get hair everywhere, or wouldn’t be trained well enough. But after a lot of research and help from all his partners he agreed to getting a dog. His only firm rule was that he needed a large breed. Which is how they ended up with a dog almost larger than Eddie himself, with a mass of lush brown fur and an exceptionally gentle temperament. Lotus E (or Lottie as Richie had taken to calling her) had been one of the best additions to the family. She was so much help to everyone in the house, even if her primary role was to assist Eddie in daily life.

“Come on Lottie, let’s go get some water.” Eddie whispers and carefully starts to get out of bed. He moves slowly as not to wake Bill up, grabbing his cane from beside the bed before standing up. Lottie stays close to Eddie’s side as he walks out of the room and towards the kitchen. 

Much to his surprise there’s already a dim light coming from the kitchen. When he steps in he sees the back door open and Beverly sitting on the porch outside, the porch light spreading into the kitchen. She turns around and sighs in relief when she sees Eddie. 

“Hey Eds, what are you doing up?” She asks softly. 

“Same as you I’m guessing.” He said and stepped outside. Lottie went up and licked Bev’s cheek in greeting, making her laugh softly. 

Eddie carefully sits down on the porch beside her. All things considered, Eddie had gotten out of being impaled pretty well. Most doctors had said it was a miracle he wasn’t paralyzed. It still wasn’t  _ great _ though; his spine was pretty thoroughly fucked up, the spike had cracked a couple vertebrae. Which meant walking was hard, almost impossible without his cane, and most things that had previously been easy now left Eddie in debilitating pain. But he was alive, that was an upside he supposed. “I thought you quit smoking.” He says and gestures to the pack of cigarettes in her lap. 

There’s a brief flash of fear that washes over Bev that breaks Eddie’s heart. He opens his mouth to start back tracking, but Bev speaks before he gets the chance.    
  
“I did, mostly…don’t tell Ben.” She leans against Eddie and he puts an arm around her. 

“I won’t.” 

Lottie lays down with a loud huff of breath, her head resting on Eddie’s lap. He gently pets her head while they sit in comfortable silence. 

“What was it about? Your dream?” Bev asks eventually. 

Eddie tenses up a little, before clearing his throat. “It was, uh, my mom. She showed up at the hospital after It. I don’t know why she was there. I just...I couldn’t get away from her...and you guys weren’t there…” 

Beverly takes Eddie’s hand in hers and squeezes it reassuringly. “Mine was my dad...it always is. It’s like no matter how hard I try to get him out of head, it’s always about him. Well, mostly anyways. It’s like I’m haunted.” 

“I know what you mean. I thought my mother dying would make me feel better, but it didn’t. It still always feels like her presence is there smothering me. I just want her to be gone and not have to think about her.”

They lapse back into silence for a time, Eddie gently rubs circles into Bev’s hand with his thumb. 

“What are other dreams you have? Good ones.” Bev says.

Eddie smiles softly. “I have this dream sometimes, I guess it’s a memory technically. It was when you were my date to the church dance that summer, before you moved. You were so pretty...and I was so nervous. But I mostly remember you trying to teach me to dance, you enjoyed leading way more than I did.” 

“I had forgotten about that. Is that really what you dream about?” 

“Yeah, even when I forgot you I still had the dreams about it. I never realized it meant anything until I saw you in the restaurant when we got back to Derry.” 

Beverly smiles and presses a kiss to Eddie’s temple.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hot take: Eddie and Bev's relationship is not explored nearly enough by the fandom


End file.
